a little bit more about me

My name is Beth and I accidentally have found myself living in Arizona but I'm originally from Tennessee. My education is in history and anthropology, which means that I know a little about a lot of things and can hold my own at a cocktail party in mixed company. I work in museums, doing all sorts of things ranging from researching and writing exhibits to cataloguing absolute wickety wak. I love comedy, baking, photography, my daughter, dogs, and above all else, napping.*

* 2013 edit: Oh yeah, and my new son too.

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    Entries in sleep (6)

    Sunday
    Jun292014

    nope, not bitter at all

    Me: What time are we meeting our friends at the Children's museum? 9:00?

    My Better Half: uh, not til 11:00... 

    Me: <raising one eyebrow>

    My Better Half: I tried to get them to agree to meet around 9:00 but then they said "Why so early?!"

    Me: Their kids must sleep in.

    Me: F*ck them.

    ----

    I can at least take solace in the fact that last night the Yankees (their team) lost to the Red Sox (ours). While I drink my coffee and pray for an early nap.

    Thursday
    Jun262014

    Got Chuckle?

    Does anyone have a recipe for homemade chloroform? I ask because I'm exhausted but I can't sleep. Insomnia + exhaustion is a bad combination.

    By the way, how do I know homemade chloroform even exists? Because I still remember a story My Better Half told me about a long time ago, where a friend of his figured out how to make it and called his homemade concoction "Chuckle" because the chemical makeup was something like CHCl or something. If you know how to score some, let me know. Til then I'll be self medicating my insomnia with listening to the most boring podcasts I can find.

    Monday
    Jan272014

    One of these things is not like the other

    "Nurse's line."

    Hello. Yes, um, I'm a little worried about my 4 month old.

    "Ok. What's going on?"

    Uh, so, he's, well, sleeping. A lot. Like 8 hours at a time?

    "..."

    Well, can you blame me? My first didn't sleep like that for months & months & months.

    Tuesday
    Mar202012

    A Problem Only for Upper Middle Class Moms

    I started my new job almost a year ago, when I was six months pregnant. And within a couple weeks, my new boss connected me with a woman who works here who had just come back from maternity leave. I went up to talk with her one afternoon because she'd just enrolled her daughter in the same daycare we were considering. We compared notes on the daycare, and, naturally, touched base on a lot of other baby-related issues: hospitals and birth, pumping at work, and, of course, sleep. She told me the following anecdote:

    "We had our first overnight away from the baby when she was about 3 months old. My in-laws kept her while my husband and I just went down the block and checked into a hotel. Right after check-in, we ordered room service, took a tylenol PM, and slept for, like, 12 hours." I thought she was kidding. Thing is: she wasn't kidding. One of my friends says to me, frequently, and with pity, "I always tell [our other friend] how bad I feel for you guys because you don't have any family here, so you've never really had time away from Baby! I'm SO sorry! It must be really difficult." Is it hard? You betcha. Is it worth every sleep deprived moment? Absolutely. Would we give anything for a night of uninterrupted sleep, since it's been nine months without so much as a night off?

    Sorry, had to get another cup of coffee.

    Yes.

    But let's keep this in context. Do you really think that moms around the world feel sorry for themselves because they can't get a night off? Do you think that moms across the US have the luxury to entertain the thought of getting a full night's sleep, nevermind in a ritzy resort where they get room service and a pedicure and facial the next day? We certainly don't. Clearly a first world problem. Especially in this sh*tty-ass economy.

    Our world has been turned upside down, but in all the right ways. We are blessed with a healthy, adorable, loving, curious, funny, happy Baby. We couldn't be luckier. So we'll have to put up with being  sleep deprived and caffeine-dependant until she sleeps through the night since we don't have someone who can take her. If that's the biggest problem we have, we're doing pretty damn well. We'll just keep brewing more coffee so we can keep up with her.

    Monday
    Jan302012

    Yes, Virginia, There is Such a Thing as 'Too Much Coffee'

    This morning, baby woke up to feed at 2 a.m. and, as is her usual pattern these days, just needed a little top-off to get her back to sleep, so she was back out within 10 minutes. Me, on the other hand, could not get back to sleep.

    At all.

    So when it came time to get up, I stumbled into the kitchen to get the coffee that I so desperately would require to make it through a workday. I poured a gigantic mug full and drank it, and packed another mug for the road. Drank most of it en route. 

    When I got to work, I poured another cup.

    And now I feel ill.