a little bit more about me

My name is Beth and I accidentally have found myself living in Arizona but I'm originally from Tennessee. My education is in history and anthropology, which means that I know a little about a lot of things and can hold my own at a cocktail party in mixed company. I work in museums, doing all sorts of things ranging from researching and writing exhibits to cataloguing absolute wickety wak. I love comedy, baking, photography, my daughter, dogs, and above all else, napping.*

* 2013 edit: Oh yeah, and my new son too.

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    Entries in academics (6)

    Tuesday
    Dec022014

    Getting slapped around by irony

    Another academic jobs cycle has all but come to a close. After submitting to all available openings in his field, My Better Half scored exactly zero interviews - so far, anyway. We haven't extinguished all hope just yet because some places are still reviewing applications, but let's face it, chances are not good. So we were looking for silver linings yesterday while My Better Half was sorting through the mail. I said "At least we're not going to be moving to North Dakota?" as he unfolded a newspaper clipping that his dad had sent in the mail.

    This article, in fact:

     

    Oh the irony!

    PS - I don't care, I'm *still* not moving to North Dakota. I'm sure it's lovely and all, but it is not for me.

    Friday
    Sep262014

    I'll be over here, avoiding the interwebz

    One article that's been making the rounds this week - at least in my inbox and on my feed - is this one from Slate that attempts to demystify the academic job application process for non-academics. I had made myself a deal to stop reading anything about the job market. Because it's all too familiar that the tenure-track job market is bleak at best. Or that winning a tenure-track job isn't all it's cracked up to be. And that even full-time non-tenure-track jobs are scarce as teaching gets farmed out to adjuncts. And that Ph.Ds continue to face the choice of either accepting the unsustainble pay and working conditions that come with being an adjuct or opting out of their academic field altogether. There may be 100 reasons to go online and find out why you should not go to grad school. But especially if you're about to graduate with a Ph.D, you just might want to avoid the web altogether.

    If you don't, you'll be faced with articles like that Slate one. But at least that one comes in handy for explaining to friends & family why this any time of year is a terrible time to ask an academic "So....how's the job search going?" As you can guess, for some reason, I read it, hoping it would be...I don't know, funny, maybe? That we could all chuckle at how ridiculously awful the prospects are and how tiny the chances of landing something. See? The potential for hilarity is oh Jesus they just used the phrase 'existential death spiral.' Closing that tab.

    In my house, we're already knee deep in hopelessness about this year's market in My Better Half™'s field. So far there are seven - SEVEN! - jobs nationwide that he at least sort of qualifies for. As we read a result from the job alerts we subscribe to, we even hold out hope because we've seen several that open with "The ideal candidate will teach..." YES HE TEACHES ALL OF THOSE AND HAS GREAT TEACHING EVALUATIONS AND

    Oh.

    That's when we scroll down to the qualifications and realize the futility in applying. Sometimes it's because every last minimum and desired qualification is aimed at demonstrating the candidate's success at securing *research* dollars - nothing whatsoever about teaching experience and abilities. Sometimes it's because the job specifies "Strong preference for research experience in the river beds of southeastern Ohio" or some sh*t like that. And sometimes - and I'm not even making this up - it's because the job specifies that while you should have a Ph.D. in one field, you should also have Ph.D.-level research expertise in another entirely different field too. Sorry, we didn't realize he should have been pursuing a dual Ph.D. in anthropology and pediatric dentistry at the same time. Sure, he'll still apply because we know that nobody is ever a perfect match for any job in any field. But who knows? Maybe there is that one candidate out there who matches all those qualifications more closely. (There usually is when it comes to academics).

    Luckily, My Better Half™ got real with himself two years ago as he began to track the academic jobs and determined that if teaching was his desired end game, he would pursue community college jobs, where work is all about teaching and not 100% research-focused. Wait. Where do community colleges list their jobs? Our job alerts at Chronicle of Higher Education and HigherEdJobs.com are surfacing only university - and the occasional yet even more highly coveted private liberal arts college - jobs. As time passed, we began to wonder about this more and more. After a year of receiving these job alerts, we had seen only one community college job. Perhaps they just don't advertise nationally? We finally broke down and sheepishly emailed the advice columnist at the Chronicle of Higher Ed who covers the community college job market, and he responded that community college jobs are typically posted at HigherEdJobs.com. Oh, well, let me go in and alter our search alert so that

    Sonofab*tch.

    Our HigherEdJobs alert HAS been set to include community college jobs for the TWO YEARS we have had it set up. It's just that there haven't been any community college jobs for the alert to capture. 

    Some days it's easier than others to say "F it. We'll just take our own path and opt out of this academic job crisis nonsense and figure out plan B and life will be just fine." Other days, it's harder to see how to make our way out of path dependency. Especially when you open an article only to be faced with a nice summary of all the work required to apply, only to face such terrible odds.

    Thursday
    Sep042014

    duct taping it all together

    Here it is just after Labor Day and I have no idea where summer went. Oh, wait, I live in PHX so for all intents & purposes, it's still here, sticking its ugly thumb in my eye until at least Halloween. But the "fall" semester descended upon us a couple of weeks ago, and it is the. last. fall. semester. ever.

    Or it was supposed to be.

    My Better Half™ was supposed to graduate in December. Now that's up in the air. His committee needs time to read the thousand pages he's written or some sh*t like that. Can't they just nod and go to their happy place like I do and sign something that says "yeah, whatever, sounds good, nice work!"? The point is that the patience that I had allocated to get me through one last semester of nonstop thinking anxiety about what the job market will hold for him and him stressing 24/7 about final edits and graphics and keeping up with all the department and graduation paperwork, and Oh yeah that whole what the F*CK to do after graduation needs to be spread out even more. Our idea that we would be able to reclaim more work-life balance and spend more time together as a family doing fun stuff has been pushed out to an even more distant horizon. 

    I've been doing my best to deal with that. Deep down I'm pissed. But deep, DEEP down, I'm still pissed but also part of me is the tiniest bit relieved that he won't graduate until May because 1) it will look less bad to not have a job a year from now when you've only been unemployed since May (on paper anyway) and 2) the job market BLOWS so who cares? What's the rush? The past couple of years, the academic job market has been great solidly not sucky in his field. If you're a bioarchaeologist. (He's not). This year it seems to be decent marginally not sucky if you're a cultural anthropologist. (He's not). But it doesn't stop my brain from leaping ahead and connecting the dots unnecessarily. When the job alerts that we're subscribed to come in, I find myself going "would I even entertain living THERE? what about our house, what about our kids, what about my job?" before I even get to "Desired Qualifications: Active research agenda in race and ethnicity, sociolinguistics, and award winning publications in the economic exchange systems of Sons of Anarchy." I mean, come ON! Now if it were just Game of Thrones Beheadings he'd stand a chance... But at least the piecing together consulting + adjuncting work here is the devil we know, the job market is a complete unknown. 

    What's made all that harder even still to deal with has been just a lot of adjustments in my personal life. This time around, I'm really feeling the isolating effects of having a baby. Part of it is I have very little energy left over after a long workday & two kiddos 3 and under, so I can't summon the energy to think about what there is to go do, nevermind go do it. I'm just tired. All. The. Time. Also, just the timing of where our kids are at socially. Baby is at the peak of separation anxiety and requires being held at all of the times. So it's just not all that fun to go out with them - I have to hold him. And when we do go out, Dawdler Toddler Preschooler stands frozen in place, clinging to my legs because she's around "strangers" (i.e., anyone she doesn't live with), so I can maybe get in 90 seconds of adult conversation at a time. And we almost never, EVER get to go out without them - it's just too much money for a sitter when you're only one full-time income and have 2 kids in daycare and no family nearby to dump the kids off with. I think we've been out once without the kids since Baby was born. Which will be a year ago in 3 weeks. (Or should I also count the time we used a sitter for us to have a date night the night I was IN THE HOSPITAL GIVING BIRTH? So twice then?)

    Part of it is just the rhythm of life with a baby (not just particular to our current financial & geographical circumstances). You find yourself housebound when the baby's asleep. In other words during the very same block of time you could be getting something done, you're stranded inside your home seeing as Child Protective Services doesn't look too kindly on leaving the little ones at home alone while you run errands. Thank God for the interwebz...but there's only so much shopping and reading and movie watching you can get done online. Amazon's not all that convenient when it's milk you need FOR YOUR COFFEE or library books to return. And when you can venture forth, you're got a little person (or in my case, two) attached at the hip, so heading to that new movie you're dying to see or out with friends for a beer is not in the cards. And even if you can get out every once in awhile, social things can just be such a pain in the ass when you have to lug around a diaper bag stuffed with diapers, changes of clothes, hats, sunscreen...I'm cranky just typing a list never mind hauling it all around. As a result, all my "free" time becomes the spare moments I have for errands + gym + fun. In other words: no time left for fun 99% of the time.

    And do I even need to mention life in Arizona during the summer? It might be fall where you are, but here it's still 109 out there. Or so I hear, since I am too scared to peek out through the blackout curtains. People hole up indoors and/or take a bunch of time off to get the hell away from the Death Star. It should go without saying that I've been avoiding Face-stagram all summer because I'm seething with jealousy at all my friends' trips to California, Hawaii, the beach, hikes in Flagstaff, and everywhere else that isn't 109. So between the isolation of being at home with Baby and being indoors while it seems like the ENTIRE rest of the world is out having a blast has taken its toll. I guess while much of the rest of you get seasonal affective disorder from gray wintry days, I get it here from all the sun. I like a nice sunny day here & there. But it's hard to appreciate when you're living on the surface of the sun. It is relentless - brandishing a hole in my retinas and a deep resentment in my skin expressed by eleventeen million new freckles every month. I need weather. I need seasons. I could more easily accommodate living here if I ever got to escape and experience weather that would make me more appreciative of what I'd be coming back to. But since we're still living the grad school life, there are no funds to get us out of here from time to time. Since I'm long winded today, I'll also save you the details of our car troubles, too. As in: much of the summer spent WITHOUT AIR CONDITIONING in our one and only functioning vehicle. Bottom line: it's hard to get out of the house, which feels really isolating.

    You know what else feels isolating? Not being in sync with your friends. Our closest friends have all moved in the last 2 years. Every. Last. One. And now I'm struggling with knowing where to find our kind of peeps. We find ourselves gravitating more and more towards hanging out with the parents of our Dawdler Toddler Preschooler's friends because if nothing else, they get the whole kids thing. The whole there is a naptime and a bedtime, and it's tough to get out during those times and no, we can't wait til 11-ish on a Sunday at a hip restaurant for an hour to have breakfast because we'd all be dying from our kids' whining us to death from low blood sugar. I've been trying to make new friends at work. And, uh. Yeah, see? That's about the only place I go besides the gym. But, it's slow and hard, and y'know, just takes time even when you do make a work friend. Which I haven't really yet. 

    So I've been holding it all together. Trying to just make my way from work to the gym to daycare. Repeat. It's been going o-kaaayyyyy, I guess, but not great. I think that all of these things will get better soon. But I just don't know when "soon" is. 

    Monday
    Apr282014

    A Public Service Announcement

    The following are incompatible:

    • Trying to catch up on sleep at any opportune moment while living in a household with 
      • a Dawdler Toddler who invents every excuse under the sun to delay bedtime (because that's what toddlers do)
      • a 7 month old who refuses to sleep through the night for no good reason whatsoever

    - while also - 

    • Trying to relieve My Better Half™ of many parenting duties so as to permit him blocks of uninterrupted time and focus to write a dissertation.

    The following are also incompatible:

    • Trying to escape the soul-crushing pressure to finish a dissertation so that one can have free time again (aka, sleep, attend to the monstrously long honey-do chores list so our house does not fall down, and for the love of all that is holy, relax for the first time in months years)

    - while also -

    • Knowing that 'free time' should really be defined as the pressure of "hurry up and get a job, goddamnit!"

    And, finally, the following are also incompatible:

    •  Trying to predict whether one will be able to find childcare on such short notice should one accept an offer of seasonal archaeological fieldwork

     - or -

    • Deciding to turn down said job offer in order to avoid bringing in a chess master to calculate and predict the matrix of childcare solutions such a job would require, with the hopes of finding another part-time job that may never materialize 

    Those who attempt to reconcile these incompatible goals report side effects including sleeplessness, restlessness, frustration, stress, loss of patience, and an inability to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

    Tuesday
    Apr222014

    Path Dependency

    I've always been fascinated to hear how people fall into their line of work. Some, like me, seem to stumble backasswards into what they do. Some people seem to be able to leverage a hobby into a career. Some, like My Better Half, seem to be oriented to a particular path for as long as anyone can remember. He is an academic archaeologist through and through with a voracious appetite for any and every scholarly work in his field. His insatiable quest for anthropological expertise has been around since he was 3, if not sooner, according to collective family memory. And he can't help but teach no matter where he goes, regardless of whether his students are actually students.

    Too bad academic teaching isn't so much a thing anymore.

    When he started this journey, the job market seemed reasonably rosy. He left behind steady work as an archaeologist for a consulting company to go back to school so he could achieve his dream of teaching. And if his dream of teaching at the college level didn't pan out for some reason, no matter - he could always pan for gold. Or at least go back to being a field archaeologist.

    We always knew how competitive any academic job market would be, but we also thought that, unlike some other fields (I'm looking at you museum studies), he could always fall back on his prior career as a practicing archaeologist working for an environmental consulting company.

    What happened next is a story that's all too familiar to anyone who's been following changes in higher education, or an adjunct boom, or even adjunctivitis, whatever the hell that is. The recession meant alot of things, including a decline in public funding for higher education, trickling down to departments being unable to hire full-time tenure-track professors and increasingly relying on adjuncts to teach. To the extent that now somewhere upwards of 2/3 of those who teach at the college level are only adjuncts or instructors without any possibility of tenure.

    What all that means in our household is uncertainty & inertia. The very few full-time instructor or tenure-track jobs that were available were open months ago, when he was still neck deep in writing drafts of chapters. And taking care of a newborn. And the 2 year old. And teaching at the community college. And TAing at the university. And taking care of cooking, cleaning, & yardwork. Now that he's only knee deep in putting the final chapters together, there are only temporary openings, 1 year appointments, mostly.

    No matter. He can fall back on field archaeology until he lands a teaching gig, right? Not exactly. Even in his former career as a field archaeologist, the recession meant that the kinds of projects that triggered the need for archaeological fieldwork collapsed. No new housing developments being built, no major road construction, no new light rail lines, no substantial construction of any kind at all meant that cultural resource management firms shrunk (read: layoffs) or closed, leaving even those in his "backup" career path under- or unemployed and with no clear path. But even if he could find field work, would that work, uh, work for us? A quick look at our bank account says "absof*ckinglutely" but a quick look at our two (very young) kids says "nah uh." Not at this stage in our lives.

    So what's left? That's the problem. He worries that he is path dependent. And in the most general sense, of course he is because we all are. The choices we made in the past necessarily influence the present. But his point is that by choosing to get a Ph.D. he has continually winnowed his opportunities down to such a degree that he now stands almost no chance of being seen as anything other than grossly overqualified for anything other than teaching at the college level. Which, if you recall what you've been reading since paragraph 2, is about like the odds of scoring a job in journalism. Or law

    Sure, he's got a steady recurring gig as an adjunct. Which is going great says no one nowhere. Is it any wonder so many Ph.D. students are jumping ship? Sure, if you're not destined for academia, then is the Ph.D. necessary? Maybe, maybe not (basically: it depends). And while we should not forget that those who have Ph.D.s also are empowered to make choices, what about those who dream of nothing but a shot at the academic career and nothing else? What about those who want to be dependent on that particular path? 

    In our household, we'll have to wait and see. Plan A is to abide by the adjunct's life for the fall semester while Better Half goes on the academic job market (if there is anything in his area to pursue) and see what happens. Plan B? Still not clear. Selling drugs, perhaps?